What Kind of Medicine Did You Think I Was Selling in My Gourd?

"Hmph. As expected, he didn't return with us. That kid is still in the Settlement Space. The Abnormal Affairs Bureau really lucked out."

Tuxing Sun said sarcastically, a mocking smile plastered on his face.

Beside him, Shi Gandang asked, "How much do you think he managed to get?"

Their memories, naturally, only went as far as the moment they were crushed into fresh watermelon juice by Principal Wang. They knew nothing about the school dismissal event that followed.

"No matter what the upper limit is, he has at least one piece of Common Equipment. If he was lucky, maybe he even got a decent piece of Fine Quality equipment," Qinghe Yikan said, feigning indifference.

But her tone was filled with resentment.

As the first person eliminated, she was naturally filled with helplessness and rage. She had been the player closest to the truth at the beginning! She was the first to find out about the Little Black Room, yet she ended up leaving empty-handed.

Who could possibly accept that?

The three of them guarded the flowerbeds near the Teaching Building. From that position, they could immediately detect any rustle in the grass, no matter where it came from.

Baili Dao stood at the school gate, a cigarette dangling from his mouth as he watched them with a deadpan expression.

Swish-

The next second, a tree on the outermost edge of the campus suddenly shook, as if something had just landed in its branches.

The three exchanged a look and immediately rushed over.

From a distance, they saw him. He wore a pitch-black bulletproof vest, and a hodgepodge of strange items clanked at his waist, including a peach-wood sword, a crucifix, and garlic.

Pending Death! It was him!

"Hehehe, kid, you…"

Click.

Tuxing Sun's insidious smile froze on his face.

The sharp sound had come from the other man pulling a metallic object from behind his back, disengaging the safety, chambering a round, and aiming it right at his head.

"Go on, smile. Why'd you stop?"

"Are you just naturally disinclined to smile?"

"Or did you see my old friend, the American-made Smith & Wesson M1911, and suddenly lose the ability to?"

A vicious smile appeared on Wu Wang's lips as he walked toward them, step by step. His presence sent a chill down their spines and drenched their backs in cold sweat.

It was true that they were higher-level players with more items and equipment.

But this was a fucking pistol!

Spirit Calamity Players were not gods. They were still flesh and blood. As carbon-based lifeforms, they were still vulnerable to the power of firearms.

Even if some Spirit Calamity Players could physically withstand bullets, it definitely wouldn't be a few level-five or level-six scrubs like them.

"Calm down! Brother Wang, calm down!"

Baili Dao jumped out from the side, moving to stand between them. The cigarette he was holding was already half-burnt.

Wu Wang merely raised an eyebrow.

"What? You're tempted too? Planning to join them?"

As soon as he said this, the others shook their heads repeatedly.

With the gun pointed at him, Tuxing Sun spoke especially fast.

"No, no, no, it's a misunderstanding, brother. We won't touch you. After all, the Abnormal Affairs Bureau has your back now."

As he spoke, he raised his hands where Wu Wang could see them, proving he had no hostile intentions. The other two did the same.

This strange behavior left Wu Wang, who had been preparing for a massacre, a little bewildered.

He turned his gaze to Baili Dao.

"Bro, what's going on? Did you feed them an aphrodisiac? Why have they started talking nonsense?"

What necessary connection is there between an aphrodisiac and talking nonsense!?

Hearing this familiar teasing, Baili Dao threw his cigarette to the ground, stomped it out, and spoke.

"I told them that you, Brother Wang, are already an unregistered probationary member of the Abnormal Affairs Bureau."

"If they make a move on you, it's a provocation against us. The consequence, naturally, is being put on a wanted list. At the very least, they won't be able to operate in this country anymore."

"For a single piece of Common Equipment, it's not worth it for them to offend the Abnormal Affairs Bureau."

This reasoning made Wu Wang laugh. He rubbed his temples and asked, "Do I look like an idiot? Or do they? Who would believe such a last-minute excuse?"

Even a fool could see he had no connection whatsoever with the Abnormal Affairs Bureau. Otherwise, Baili Dao would have teamed up with him to clear the instance from the very beginning.

It was an excuse that wouldn't even fool a child.

"No. Once you sign, this reason will become real."

Baili Dao flicked his wrist, and a contract appeared out of thin air. A simple, unadorned image of a sharp sword was faintly engraved upon it.

【Temporary Worker Contract】

【A document with powerful binding effects. Both parties who reach a deal are forbidden from violating the contract's contents; otherwise, the Spirit Calamity Game will erase their player account.】

Wu Wang flipped it open with a deadpan expression. The contents were written in great detail, outlining the duties for both sides when the Abnormal Affairs Bureau recruited a rogue player.

But as he flipped through it, his expression grew puzzled.

In the middle of the contract was a plain white sheet of paper, a blank page with no information whatsoever.

At the same time, a message popped up in his field of vision.

【Baili Dao#100100 has requested to add you as a friend】

【Accept】

Wu Wang calmly chose to accept.

He was dying to see what kind of medicine this Baili Dao was selling in his gourd.

The moment he accepted the friend request, Baili Dao's words immediately popped up in the chat box.

"Brother Wang, my apologies. I had no choice but to resort to this. Just pretend to sign the contract, but actually write your name on the blank paper. Pass it off as real to convince them."

"I don't want to take advantage of your situation and force you to join the Abnormal Affairs Bureau. Of course, if you are interested, we would welcome you warmly."

"By the way, you know our country's regulations on firearm possession are extremely strict, right? Players from the Abnormal Affairs Bureau can be legally armed."

Unless a person chose to make it public, no one else could see their information panel. Their conversation was completely secure, and the three people nearby had no way of knowing what was being said. They could only see Wu Wang standing there, thinking.

To be honest, Wu Wang really hadn't expected Baili Dao to go this far. In a way, the other man's method was quite brilliant.

On one hand, it resolved Wu Wang's immediate crisis. On the other, it showed magnanimity and a non-coercive attitude, making him feel more favorable toward the Abnormal Affairs Bureau.

I didn't expect the medicine Baili Dao was selling in his gourd was a government job!

If Wu Wang were an ordinary player, he might have tearfully chosen to join them at this point.

Unfortunately, he was not.

"Brother Baili, I appreciate the sentiment, but the contract won't be necessary."

Wu Wang smiled and handed the contract back, then turned to the three Rogue Players, who all wore strange expressions.

"You think you can take me down so easily?"

"You'll have to find out who I am first. You don't really think this is my true face, do you?"

The moment he finished speaking, his face began to melt. His entire frame grew taller, and the chest of his bulletproof vest began to swell, nearly popping the buttons.

Before everyone's stunned eyes, he transformed from a handsome young man into a beautiful young woman. Her fiery figure, paired with a delicate and bewitching face, made her unforgettable.

"Hehehe, I have many other appearances for you to choose from. Which one would you like to see?"

Wu Wang's movements became elegant and full of charm. As he laughed, he raised a hand to gently brush against his own luscious lips. His hips canted to the side, his pants outlining a perfect curve that left the others feeling parched.

However, before anyone could respond, Wu Wang's entire body almost instantly blended into the night. A closer look revealed that his skin had turned pitch-black as his features shifted, transforming him into a black man with thick lips and short dreadlocks.

He covered his mouth with one hand and dropped an impromptu beatbox, even adding, "Yo yo yo, I'm a rapper! S… Skr~"

In just a dozen seconds, the visual impact he delivered was even more jaw-dropping than his wild antics in the instance.

"What… what is this?"

"An item? Or an equipment effect?"

"Damn it! He was never using his real face to interact with us!"

The expressions of the three rogue players became extremely bitter. Originally, when they saw Wu Wang reject the Abnormal Affairs Bureau's invitation, they had been secretly delighted.

Their greatest advantage was that they were freelancers who knew Wu Wang's real identity, meaning they could dox him at any time. Even if they couldn't rob him face-to-face, they could later use his friends or family as threats. An old pro always has ways to deal with a newcomer.

But now, the tables had turned.

His face, even his gender, could be fake, but their own faces were real. Their doxxing plan couldn't lock onto a target.

But he could hide in a crowd, change his face, find out everything about them, and then lie in wait near their homes, or even impersonate their friends and family.

There goes my lifeline!

"Brother Baili, don't worry, I'm aware of the firearm regulations. Besides, how could a commoner like me get a real gun? Here, look if you don't believe me."

"It's all fake…"

SQUIRT!

The moment he finished speaking, Wu Wang aimed the gun in his hand at Baili Dao and pulled the trigger. A stream of clear liquid shot out from the barrel, viciously soaking the other man's shoe.

"What kind of factory makes a damn water gun this realistic!"

Baili Dao couldn't hold it in and laughed with exasperation. At the same time, he breathed a sigh of relief.

Although Wu Wang had refused to join the Abnormal Affairs Bureau, his current attitude clearly showed he still had a good impression of them and would not become an enemy.

Forget it. It's fine if he doesn't join. As long as he doesn't become an enemy.

"I'm off! I'm going to use Moon Step to find the One Piece! See you all later!"

As his voice fell, Wu Wang leaped high into the air. In mid-air, he stomped his foot again.

A double jump!

Then a third, a fourth…

He gradually disappeared over the distant horizon, his altitude surpassing most of the city's buildings.

Baili Dao turned back to look at the three. Just as he was about to warn them against getting any funny ideas, he found that only Shi Gandang and Qinghe Yikan were left.

"Damn it! That bastard really dares!"

He snapped his head up and focused his eyes.

【Eagle Vision】 activated!

He saw Tuxing Sun's short figure appearing out of nowhere next to the mid-air Wu Wang, a ferocious look on his face as he brandished a pale blue dagger. It was obviously not an ordinary knife, but some kind of equipment or item.

The quality was perhaps not high, probably just 【Inferior】. But since he had taken it out, he clearly believed it could inflict a fatal wound on Wu Wang.

That bastard really had no good intentions. The gourd he was selling was full of poison!

"Since I can't settle scores with you later… I'll just kill you now, won't I? Hahaha!"

Tuxing Sun laughed wildly. If nothing else, the item the other guy had used to constantly change his build and appearance was at least Fine Quality. He could tell it wasn't an illusion, but a real, physical change! This was good stuff!

He'd just kill him now and take his loot. Then he'd use that item to hide in the crowd.

He was about to get a huge windfall!

BANG!

A loud bang echoed through the air.

The smile was still on Tuxing Sun's face, but a clean hole had appeared on his forehead. He was as dead as one could be.

"Wahoo! A Kennedy-style mind-opener!"

Wu Wang laughed cheerfully. His right hand still held the realistic-looking water gun. But in his left hand, a crude-looking pistol had appeared out of nowhere. It didn't look like a standard-issue weapon, but more like a homemade Kalashnikov.

As for where it came from, Wu Wang had a lot to say about that.

Even before becoming a Spirit Calamity Player, he had quietly made and hidden it. The player backpack just made it much more convenient to carry.

The main reason he hadn't used it in the instance was that brute force couldn't solve the problem of Gao Shan High School. Plus, he hadn't had time to make a silencer, and the noise would have made him a public enemy.

"What kind of medicine did you think I was selling in my gourd?"

"What I'm selling is gunpowder!"