Old Geezer! Your Stand-in Is the Most Useless!

"Hoo-ha! Hoo-ha!"

Dong-long-long~ Dong-long-long~

The plaza before the wooden plaque was a scene of wild celebration. Two bare-chested strongmen, each holding a torch, danced wildly. They spat fire into the air, the sparks mingling with the red glow of the setting sun. The ground and the faces of the villagers were all dyed a shade of crimson.

The air was electric.

To the side, the sound of gongs and drums was deafening, as if announcing the ritual to the entire world. Yin Fate Village's grand ritual was a magnificent spectacle.

After the villagers had eaten and drunk their fill, the invited opera troupe began to clang and clamor.

The giant plaza, which could hold over a thousand people, bustled with extraordinary excitement. It was like a grand and spectacular fair. This alone proved that Yin Fate Village was, as the Instance description said, free from want of food and clothing. One might even call it prosperous.

Wu Wang and the Old Village Chief sat side by side on the highest viewing platform.

He would occasionally peel the melon seeds on the table and savor them, applauding and cheering when the performances below reached their most exciting moments.

"Who exactly are you? And where did you take Zhang Sanfeng?"

The Old Village Chief's voice was quiet, completely drowned out by the surrounding commotion.

Yet, Wu Wang, who shouldn't have been able to hear a thing, turned his head and flashed a brilliant smile.

"Who do you think I should be? And why do you people need Zhang Sanfeng?"

After Wu Wang had retaliated against the Old Village Chief with the bone spur, the man couldn't lash out under the watchful eyes of the public. But he couldn't let Wu Wang run off, either.

The skeleton ghost knew that Wu Wang could change his appearance and build. The moment he blended into the crowd, he could vanish without a trace, especially on a chaotic day like today when the entire village was gathered.

So, he had arranged a seat for Wu Wang on the viewing platform. It seemed he wanted to talk. The villagers near them had even been sent away to join the feast, all to prevent others from hearing their conversation.

"There's no harm in telling you." The Old Village Chief picked up a cup of wine from the table and took a gentle sip. "Zhang Sanfeng is the accursed spawn born to a Yin Fate Saintess before the grand ritual. His life can be used to repay the village's debt."

"Debt? Loan sharking is illegal now, you know," Wu Wang said sarcastically.

Of course, he knew the debt the man spoke of wasn't monetary. It was something else, something far more esoteric.

The Old Village Chief explained, "All things in the world are relative. The Yin Fate Great God has blessed the village with prosperity, so we must also give a satisfactory return. He has always favored women of the utmost yin, and one must be offered up every year."

"But an accident happened last year. The Yin Fate Saintess hanged herself on the eve of the grand ritual."

"We owe him a Saintess. If we fail to make an offering again this year, Yin Fate Village's fortune will have run its course."

"Although Zhang Sanfeng is not a woman, he has the blood of a Yin Fate Saintess. It can placate the Yin Fate Great God's wrath."

Hearing this, Wu Wang couldn't help it. He let out a snort.

Munching on melon seeds, he asked indistinctly, "Then what kind of thing are you?"

His original plan had been to take revenge on the Old Village Chief. He wanted to make the man fly into a rage out of humiliation and reveal his true form, stripping the villagers of their trust in him.

He never expected this skeleton ghost to be so forbearing. Even after such a humiliation, he showed no intention of exposing himself. He even planned to have a heart-to-heart talk.

What was he plotting?

"Me? I am also a villager of Yin Fate Village." The Old Village Chief cracked a slow smile. "Or you could say, I built this village. I was the first village chief."

"?"

Wu Wang was stunned.

During the day, while disguised as a villager, he had inquired about the village's history. Most villagers had family genealogies, so the history was well-preserved.

This place was founded about two hundred years ago. It had been called Yin Fate Village from the very beginning, though it was dilapidated and desolate back then. A group of refugees fleeing disaster had banded together and settled here.

Worshipping the Yin Fate Great God was also a simple affair, just burning some paper money and offering some incense. There was no such thing as a Yin Fate Saintess.

But starting with the second village chief, worshipping the Yin Fate Great God began to require human sacrifice. And it was from that time that the village's fortunes improved day by day until it became what it was today.

Not only were they free from want, but they could even send some of their intelligent children to study in the outside world.

The first village chief…

This skeleton ghost was a being from two hundred years ago?

"Weren't you trying to eat me during the day? Why the sudden change of heart? Don't forget, I just stabbed you," Wu Wang said, his tone dripping with cold sarcasm.

The man's attitude had done a complete one-eighty since that afternoon. The shift was so drastic that anyone could tell something was wrong.

"That's because, at first, I didn't know you had a way to absorb this…"

With that, the Old Village Chief stretched out a trembling hand. He pointed at the large wooden plaque covered by a black cloth. On it was the eye, the mark of the Abyss God.

He turned to look at Wu Wang, his deeply sunken, almost hollow eyes bursting with intense desire.

He said, trembling, "How about a deal? You teach me how to absorb the aura of that existence, and I can give you anything you want!"

"?"

Wu Wang was full of question marks.

What the hell kind of being was this Abyss God? Any Instance contaminated by it would become twisted and bizarre, yet other strange entities were trying to absorb its aura.

Principal Wang in Fight Back to School was one. This Old Village Chief was another.

What benefit could there be in absorbing this aura? Why couldn't he feel it at all? Other than changing his missions and trying to turn his brain into a pile of mush, what else could it do?

Sometimes, Wu Wang really wanted to take a red pen and draw a mouth under the Red Vertical Pupil on his wrist, just to have the Abyss God properly answer his questions.

"First, you tell me. What do you plan to do after you get the Abyss God's… that aura?"

Wu Wang stuffed some candies and melon seeds into his pocket. A thief never leaves empty-handed; eat some, take some!

The Old Village Chief's expression grew serious.

He enunciated each word, "I will replace the Yin Fate Great God and become the new guardian god of the village."

Pfft!

Wu Wang couldn't help but laugh out loud. Sometimes he really couldn't understand these guys. Or rather, he couldn't understand their absurdity.

Principal Wang had proclaimed himself righteous, trying to strip students of their humanity under the pretext of doing what was best for them.

The Old Village Chief called the Yin Fate Great God a guardian god, but the price was one fresh, living life after another. And he himself wanted to become such a man-eating guardian god.

What the fuck was he protecting? What a bunch of sanctimonious hypocrites.

"I saw the Yin Fate Great God in my first year as village chief." The Old Village Chief's eyes grew melancholic.

"He made a deal with me, giving me the ability to be Undying, but the price was that I became inhuman. I have to change into a new set of clothes every thirty years, and I must always wear these clothes when I see the villagers. Only inside the Ancestral Hall can I take them off and catch my breath."

"This kind of life is too hard to bear."

"Fortunately, thirty years ago, while I was listening to music on the radio at home, I heard the call from that existence." At this, the Old Village Chief patted the wooden plaque.

A trace of ambition appeared in his eyes. "That existence is far, far stronger than the Yin Fate Great God. Even a wisp of His aura left here is enough for me to see the hope of breaking free!"

"Tell me what you want! As long as you lend me a hand, I can satisfy your every need!"

Looking at the man's slightly frenzied appearance, Wu Wang wiped the melon seed dust from his hands onto the chief's clothes.

He finally understood what the Human Skins displayed in the Ancestral Hall were.

They were the newly selected village chiefs from each generation!

Yin Fate Village's chief was replaced every thirty years. The chosen person would enter the Ancestral Hall to pay respects to the ancestors. Then, they would be skinned and killed by the skeleton ghost, who would don their skin and assume their identity.

This old geezer had been replacing them all along!

No wonder that boy was nearly beaten to death after pretending to be the village chief's grandson. The Old Village Chief hadn't felt a shred of heartache.

Because that wasn't his real grandson at all.

Wu Wang spoke mockingly. "Buddy, no, old geezer, I need to correct you on two things."

"First, those things are called human skins. Human skins that were flayed from living people. No matter what you call them, clothes or whatever, no matter how nice you make it sound, it's still human blood mantou."

"Second, you are not undying. You've just become a ghost, and ghosts can die too."

"You have yet to witness true immortality."

"Old geezer, your stand-in is the most useless!"

At this, Wu Wang's smile grew even more brilliant.

No one understood the Abyss God better than him!

And no one understood being undying better than him.